Friday, June 28, 2013

Everything pales

I've been happy this week.  I've been incredibly happy this week - more happy than I remember being for this long in my life, including the trip to Disney World when I was on Codeine the whole time (although, as I'm allergic to the stuff and it makes it nearly impossible for me to create long-term memories, I could just not be able to remember how happy I was then).  I've got a couple guesses as to what the root cause of this could be, but, to be honest, they're just that: guesses.  They're not even theories - educated guesses - they're just guesses, so I don't even feel like they're worth sharing.  The point is that I'm really happy.

This morning, as I was happily walking to school, grinning from ear to ear, I was thinking to myself about how I really don't know anything at all, and that was pretty cool.  Think about it.  Maybe I get upset because thus and such isn't going to happen... well, I mean... I don't know that.  I can't know that.  Even if I got a time machine and went to the future, I wouldn't know what was going to happen, because, hey - I can always do something different from whatever I did to make that future happen.

But then I realized that I do know something. I love G-d, and that's pretty cool. But what blew me away was that I also know that G-d loves me.  When I realized that, everything around me literally paled; it all faded into the background.  Really, the only thing that truly matters is that G-d loves me and I love Him.

It sounds cliche until you really get it, and then it feels like your mind just exploded.

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