If you never read anything else I write, read this.

I may have had the biggest revelation of my life today - just now, in fact - and I'm verbalizing it here for the first time, because I wish I had come to realize this sooner.  So I want to share it with everyone as soon as I possibly can in the hopes that it will click with them and help them not to dismiss things as antiquated rules simply because we don't understand them.

In fact, everything in the Bible just took on new, deeper meaning in light of this.  As soon as I finish here, I'm going back to reread as much of it as I can before I fall asleep.  The more I think about it all, the more excited I get.

It really all makes perfect, simple sense.

Once you can fully (well, as close to fully as possible) wrap your mind around this one fact:

G-d is not a linear being.

Don't get intimidated by the science/math speak and click away.  This is important to understand.

To reach a bigger audience, I want to also reference Madeleine L'Engle's A Wrinkle in Time.  In the book, the characters utilize something called a Tesseract.  L'Engle's explanation of this (below) has helped me to understand G-d a bit more.

We, like all things on this planet, exist in a linear fashion, with a definite beginning and a definite end (at least while we're on Earth).  We currently exist in the same state as the insect was originally.  We have never known anything outside of that state and cannot fathom anything outside of that state, much like a fetus cannot fathom anything so otherworldly as breathing air.  The latter state, the simplest explanation of a Tesseract, is so far outside of a line, that linear beings cannot really comprehend it.

Now, I'm not so audacious as to claim that G-d exists in a state of Tesseract.  Personally, I believe He exists in a plane beyond that somewhere.  My point is that, G-d exists in a state that encompasses our own so completely that we cannot comprehend it; it could never fit into our understanding.  This also means that He encompasses our entire state of being at all times.

Let me break down what this means a little bit.

G-d is the same, yesterday, today, and forever.  Yes.  Of course.  Because all of those times exist simultaneously for Him.  It's not so much that He's unchanging as He's omnipresent.  Those are all the same thing.  A=A.  It's like thinking, "Wow, this bite of doughnut that I'm chewing still happens to taste good!" - It's ridiculous to think anything else.  All of those are subpar explanations, but I hope you were expecting that, because, as I said, we're dealing with something outside of our scope of experience.

Everything the Bible says about sex and marriage that we don't really like... Yeah, G-d knew what He was talking about.  Of course.  Of course it's cheating on your future spouse to sleep with anyone else (Hebrews 13:4, among many others).  In fact, the much debated (even taboo) verse in the Bible that says not to divorce and not to remarry if you do (1 Corinthians 7:10-11) makes sense in light of this.  G-d is in all of our moments at the same time, so, to Him, we are too.  To us it feels like it's all unfolding slowly: things end; other things start.  But not to G-d.  To Him, I was just as married to my (hopefully existent) husband the day I was born as I will be on our 50th wedding anniversary.  Anything I do "before" or "after" I meet him is just the same to G-d.

Sin really does irrevocably separate us from G-d.  And nothing, NOTHING we ever do can change that.  It's not that He wants that.  It's devastating for Him.  But that's simply the plain, honest truth.  Think about the magnitude of this thing: If all moments are actually one moment, then we are constantly committing each and every sin in our lives.  There is nothing we can do.  Nothing.

The magnitude of what Christ did on the cross is heart-stopping.  Every moment for all of eternity in every direction and every plane of existence, Christ is being tortured to death to atone for those sins that also exist on that spectrum.  Every sin we could possible commit is erased the moment we do it, because Christ takes it on in that moment.  We are constantly clean.  We are constantly made new.

All praise to G-d, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly realms because we are united with Christ. (Eph. 1:3 NLT)

Even when you know it's coming (A eulogy for Jim Foglesong)

Last night while I was sleeping, the man who laid the framework for everything I know about the music industry breathed his last.  Today, there is a sadness in my heart, even though lately there had been no doubt in my mind that this day was coming and coming soon.

I met Jim Foglesong, whom I and many of my friends refer to as JFo (He smiled the biggest smile I'd ever seen from him when I asked if he minded us calling him that.), in the Fall of 2007.  He taught my Survey of Music Business class at Trevecca, a class that held the vast majority of the people who star in my fondest memories of my college years.  It took me a whole two weeks to look the man up on Wikipedia, and the results led me to do the same for each and every one of my professors.  You see, what I didn't realize was that I was basically being taught Music Business by the man who made the Business what it is today.  Let me just give you a brief overview of what he did for the Industry (as quoted from Wikipedia):

Foglesong helped lay the foundation for the new country music boom in the 1990s. As president of Dot, ABC, Capitol Records and MCA, he signed popular artists, among them Barbara Mandrell, Don Williams, Garth Brooks, Donna Fargo, Reba McEntire, the Oak Ridge Boys, Con Hunley, George Strait, Tanya Tucker, Sawyer Brown, Suzy Bogguss, Kevin Morris. Foglesong was inducted into the Country Music Hall of Fame in 2004.

My class found the late afternoon (read: directly preceding dinner) scheduling of Professor Foglesong's Tuesday/Thursday class difficult to focus through, despite his amazing credentials.  As a result, we spent a good deal of time chatting with each other over instant messenger, but our classroom was always full of laughter, and I think that's how he liked it.  I never once kidded myself into thinking that he didn't know what was going on in his classroom, but he never mentioned it.  Instead, he threw anecdotes into his lectures to keep us on our toes and pop our heads up from the glow of our computer screens.  He'd talk about his life in his younger days, and we suddenly realized that he wasn't just the grandfatherly gentleman we saw in front of us, who dressed up for class and encouraged us to do the same.  He was a real person who really lived.

Though I knew Jim was the former president of many record labels, the only time that really affected our relationship was when I was applying for internships and jobs.  All the other times, he was simply JFo, and I was Miss Royster (sometimes Anne).  We'd always stop and talk to each other when we crossed paths in the hallways of the music building.  He always had time for me, and that taught me to always have time for him.

When I went to ask him if it would be okay if I came to our Survey of Music Business II class a bit late on Thursdays, though, I was still nervous.  I didn't want to disrespect him, but I was in a bit of a pickle.  I worked at my internship (which he helped me to get, by the way) until closing time; in other words: until 10 minutes before class started.  With most of the record labels actually being in the next suburb over, it was impossible for me to safely make it back to class on time, and I felt even less comfortable asking my boss to let me leave early.  So I approached JFo.  I don't remember exactly what he said to me after hearing my well-rehearsed plea, but I do know it went something like this:

JFo: So, you're asking if you can come to my class late?
Me: Yes, sir.  But just on Thursdays.  I hate to ask it, but I don't know what else to do.
JFo: Miss Royster, I trust you.  You're a hard-worker, and I know you'll get the notes.
Me: Thank you.
JFo: Furthermore, wouldn't it be a bit silly for me to penalize you for going out and doing what I'm teaching you to do?

I love that man.

Foglesong, on being inducted into the Country Music Hall of Fame

In the years to come, I'd find myself missing classes with Prof. Foglesong.  I missed the regular contact with him and learning about his life.  I missed the familial atmosphere that came from spending so much time there with people all intent on the same goal (becoming big-shots in the Music Industry).  I missed the subtle dousing of invincibility he gave us.  Of course we could conquer the Business.  He was teaching us; he believed in us; he was for us.  How could we fail?

When Foglesong began retiring from teaching at Trevecca, I felt it sorely.  No more were the days of hallway conversations.  Though he did still attend most of my concerts and recitals, it wasn't quite the same.  We knew why he wasn't at Trevecca anymore.  His health was becoming an issue, and it was showing.  That didn't stop me from secretly hoping he'd come good on his promise from Survey I: That'd we'd all gather for our 50th reunion in that room, and he'd come in and tell us what a wonderful job we were doing (despite being in his mid-80's when he started teaching us).  Basically, he promised to be our Mr. Feeny.  I really wanted that to be true, silly as it was.

There came a time when I no longer believed I belonged in Music Business.  I began to doubt myself and my abilities in the field.  I saw my friends around me heading for stardom, and I felt nothing more than mediocre, acing the tests, but failing in the practical application.  It was in that season that I got a call from Prof. Foglesong: a call of encouragement.  He was calling to tell me he'd personally nominated me for an award in his name for excellence in the field of Music Business.  He believed in me enough to forever have my name associated with his.  Even typing that now, the levity of his action brings me to tears.

But I do not cry for Jim.  No.  Not at all.  Jim Foglesong was a man of G-d in every thing that he did.  His faith was at the core of who he was, and it radiated out from him.  He was forever loving on everyone he met, forever thinking of the people around him, forever reminding people to be honorable simply by his actions (and occasionally in word for the particularly stubborn case).

No, I cry for me.  I cry that I will not see his smiling face again for a long time.  I cry for the world, for how many people will never have the chance to be personally blessed by him.  I cry for his wife, for her monumental loss.  But I do not cry for Jim.  He is in Heaven now, and I have no doubt that he's singing his heart out.

Everything pales

I've been happy this week.  I've been incredibly happy this week - more happy than I remember being for this long in my life, including the trip to Disney World when I was on Codeine the whole time (although, as I'm allergic to the stuff and it makes it nearly impossible for me to create long-term memories, I could just not be able to remember how happy I was then).  I've got a couple guesses as to what the root cause of this could be, but, to be honest, they're just that: guesses.  They're not even theories - educated guesses - they're just guesses, so I don't even feel like they're worth sharing.  The point is that I'm really happy.

This morning, as I was happily walking to school, grinning from ear to ear, I was thinking to myself about how I really don't know anything at all, and that was pretty cool.  Think about it.  Maybe I get upset because thus and such isn't going to happen... well, I mean... I don't know that.  I can't know that.  Even if I got a time machine and went to the future, I wouldn't know what was going to happen, because, hey - I can always do something different from whatever I did to make that future happen.

But then I realized that I do know something. I love G-d, and that's pretty cool. But what blew me away was that I also know that G-d loves me.  When I realized that, everything around me literally paled; it all faded into the background.  Really, the only thing that truly matters is that G-d loves me and I love Him.

It sounds cliche until you really get it, and then it feels like your mind just exploded.

The G-word

And the L-word.  And B-word.  And the T-word.

I think it's odd the LGBT culture incites such explosions within the Church, that homosexuality and everything else we associate with it is one of the leading hot topics in Christianity.  To be honest, I'm actually blown away by the number of things that we could substitute for that cleanly that would not affect the point of what I'm about to say.

The topic of homosexuality reportedly only crossed Jesus' lips a debatable one or two times.  Now, I know this is the start of an argument with which you're probably familiar, but I'm not going down that road.  What I mean to say is this:

I'm not saying Jesus does or doesn't approve of LGBT people.  I'm saying that Jesus had other things He wanted us to deal with before we ever began that debate.

When you think about how many times Jesus mentions orphans or children, how many times He mentions feeding the hungry, how many times He mentions caring for widows and the elderly, how many times He mentions lust, how many times He mentions selflessness... Suddenly, we realize that there is an entirely different picture in play.

Have you ever noticed how our favorite pass times involve pointing out what we deem to be flaws in others?  It's a lot easier than turning inward and working on ourselves.  In fact, in my own way, I'm doing it right now.  We love to say our piece.  We hate it when that piece is aimed at us.  But that doesn't mean it's right.

1 Corinthians 12:12-26 : Unity and Diversity in the Body

12 Just as a body, though one, has many parts, but all its many parts form one body, so it is with Christ. 13 For we were all baptized by[c] one Spirit so as to form one body—whether Jews or Gentiles, slave or free—and we were all given the one Spirit to drink. 14 Even so the body is not made up of one part but of many.
15 Now if the foot should say, “Because I am not a hand, I do not belong to the body,” it would not for that reason stop being part of the body. 16 And if the ear should say, “Because I am not an eye, I do not belong to the body,” it would not for that reason stop being part of the body. 17 If the whole body were an eye, where would the sense of hearing be? If the whole body were an ear, where would the sense of smell be?18 But in fact God has placed the parts in the body, every one of them, just as he wanted them to be. 19 If they were all one part, where would the body be? 20 As it is, there are many parts, but one body.
21 The eye cannot say to the hand, “I don’t need you!” And the head cannot say to the feet, “I don’t need you!” 22 On the contrary, those parts of the body that seem to be weaker are indispensable, 23 and the parts that we think are less honorable we treat with special honor. And the parts that are unpresentable are treated with special modesty, 24 while our presentable parts need no special treatment. But God has put the body together, giving greater honor to the parts that lacked it, 25 so that there should be no division in the body, but that its parts should have equal concern for each other.26 If one part suffers, every part suffers with it; if one part is honored, every part rejoices with it.

Now, imagine this:
Picture a Church where each member of the body delved into the scriptures, focusing solely on the message G-d had for him or her that day, and, rather than going and talking about the amazing "word G-d had given" that day, put it into practice and let the word speak for itself.  Can you imagine how this Church would change the world?  Can you imagine how the Church would unite?

I think we're missing a critical part of G-d by being so focused on slashing fallacies out of our brothers and sisters.  Very few are called to be surgeons, and those who are never approach a person with a sword to do their work.  The rest of us are called to wait anxiously in the waiting room, praying and pacing, hoping and supporting each other in body, the patient in spirit.  Before we open our mouths, perhaps we should ask ourselves: What role have I been called to play?  What role am I trying to play with my words?

I see no record of Christ calling us to focus more on what other people are doing wrong than what we are doing wrong.  We're called to be constantly improving ourselves, constantly growing closer to Him, constantly focusing on Him.  If we start nit picking at someone else's life, we divert our attention; we're no longer gazing solely at G-d, we're staring intensely at another person.  How much do we sabotage ourselves in the name of "helping" others?

I would be thrilled if we could set aside this debate in favor of something more productive.  Let's focus on doing the things that Christ made painstakingly clear.  Let's make sure that we ourselves are aligned with Him, before we start trying to mold others into our own images.  Yes, we are called to make disciples, but we are called to make HIS disciples, not our own.  This means that there are going to be times when the people we helped to bring to Christ are going to act in ways that would be different than our inclinations.  We can point this out to them, lovingly, but, in the end, the most we can do for them is point them back to G-d and pray.  The key here is that it all hinges on relationships.  A stranger cannot permeate your  beliefs and opinions, cannot change your actions.  Only a personal, loving relationship can introduce someone to a personal, loving relationship with G-d, which will then induce change.  So, if you truly wanted someone to change and weren't just in it for the sport of bullying people, wouldn't you make a point of seeking out the people with whom you disagreed and attempting to build a relationship with them?  I know Christ did...

Just some thoughts that have been bothering me lately.

Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye. -Matthew 7:3-5

"Let there be no division among you..."

Today I was overwhelmed by a desire for unity within the Church.  I feel it's Christ's desire more than my own.  I think it pains Him to hear us discount various denominations, to ignore them in our counts of "churches" from our missionary work, to follow the teachings of one train of thought unquestioningly, to fear each other for are differing beliefs.

Personally, I wish we could disband them entirely.

Today's post won't be long; I think that expresses my thoughts well enough on the topic.

The Demon-Possessed Man: Part 9 - Stay

<<Part 8

The man from whom the demons had gone out begged to go with him, but Jesus sent him away, saying, “Return home and tell how much G-d has done for you.” So the man went away and told all over town how much Jesus had done for him.  -Luke 8:38-39

There are so many things on which I could make little comments in these verses that it's tempting to me to expand this post into two.  I may still do that, as it's incredibly hard for me to leave this series with only 9 installments, but I also have some other things I want to share with you, and it's hard for me to do that with this series weighing on my mind, saying "But you need to finish meeeeee!"  I hope that it's been as enlightening for you as it has been for me as I've studied this passage.

So, here we go... as far as I know, the last part:

I'm going to start with a tidbit, something worth noting.  Please re-read the first ten-words.  Suddenly, our Demon-Possessed Man has a new handle.  In spite of living a significant portion of his life one way, this one incident completely redefined him, and history makes a point of noting that.  So the next time you feel like you're too stuck in your patterns or that no one will allow you to change (or you're doing that to someone else), remember that this man, who was, I'm sure, far more extreme than you, had his moniker changed for all of time in a mere 14 verses.  (Moral of the story: Don't get stuck in your opinions of anyone, including yourself.)

Now, on to the crux of the matter, the confusing way I left you last time.   (Sorry about that.)  

Jesus leaves us when we ask.

But He doesn't.

But He does.

At this point, we've got two very legitimate, very weighty verses competing.  In the red corner:  Luke 8:37 (Then all the people of the region of the Gerasenes asked Jesus to leave them, because they were overcome with fear. So he got into the boat and left.)  In the blue corner, the double-headed, most quoted option out there: Deuteronomy 31:6 / Hebrews 13:5 (Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.)  And, just for you, I'm going to leave out any contextual, devil's-advocate-type argument I could make here.  You're welcome.

These two verses, I'm sure, cause a lot of stress for those who look at them lifted from their passages.  Because, in this form, they really do seem to be contradicting each other.  But I'm here to tell you today that they're not.  They are resolved in the verse I highlighted today.

Again, today, we see begging.  But this time, Christ does not give into it.  In fact, we see more of the response I was expecting Him to give the demons.  He tells the Man from whom the Demons Had Gone Out to leave.  To go away.  But He also gives the Man FWTDHGO an important instruction more: "Tell how much G-d has done for you."  Essentially, Jesus tells the man to go back to the city and share his testimony.  Christ has been asked to leave, and He complies, but He leaves His messenger, a bit of Himself with the people nonetheless.  We may ask Christ to leave, but he will always leave us with some of Himself, aching for us to accept Him.

But let's turn to the MFWTDHGO for a moment.  This guy knew what he wanted.  He had been drastically changed by Christ's intervening love.  He wanted desperately to drop everything and follow Him right then and there, leaving it all behind and trekking across the country after Christ.  He begged Christ to let Him, and Christ said, "No."  Speaking as one who has heard that "No," that moment is devastating.  It's confusing, it's painful, it's crushing.  It feels like betrayal.  Yet the MFWTDHGO picks himself up and follows orders.  I can't help but think that this was a little easier for him, since he had seen the people reject Christ and knew that He needed a voice there still.  But we often aren't given the big picture while we're still given the command that goes against the deepest desire of our hearts.  That's hard.

We have these life-changing, mountain-top experiences, and all we want to do is cling to them.  We are given new insight into the Word, and all we want to do is study more.  We find peace, and all we want to do is dive into its depths.  But this... this isn't the way G-d works.  That is an entirely self-driven religion, and Christ-following has to do with everything but the self.

We cannot see the big picture, know what G-d knows, or understand G-d's reasoning (usually).  We have to admit this, because this is the first and most crucial step of trust.  If we can admit this and cling to His goodness, then and only then can we trust Him and say as Christ says a mere 14 chapters later, "Nevertheless not my will, but thine, be done." (Luke 22:42 KJV)   Ultimately, this should be the cry of any Christ-follower.  This is the fullest sacrifice of praise, to cry out the the pain and despair of broken personal dreams and scream NOT MY WILL, BUT THINE!  Until we can do this, we are nothing but self-seekers.  Once we cross the line, we are called, we are sent, and we are crucified with Christ.

Then Jesus told his disciples, “If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. For whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will find it.  -Mathew 16:24-25

1. Tombs
2. Recognition
3. Familiarity
4. Impure
5. Solitary Places
6. Respect
7. Fear
8. Leave
9. Stay

Thank you for reading.  Please feel free to leave any questions or comments below.

The Demon-Possessed Man: Part 8 - Leave

<<Part 7                                                                                                                                    Part 9>>

So he got into the boat and left. - Luke 8:37b

We've all been taught that Jesus stands knocking on the door to your heart, waiting for you to let Him in.  We've grown up staring at the picture in rooms where elderly people gather (I don't know why only older people hang this picture up, but it must be a rule somewhere).  I could write about how I'm not sure that's quite how it works, but that's another post for another day.  My point today is that we were given freewill.  We are free to follow after Christ, and we are free to send Him packing.  The beauty of this, though, is that we now have the ability to legitimately love.  Love is a choice that one must make, so if we did not have the choice to not love, we would also not have the choice to love.  It's a little bit of a mind twister, but I promise it makes sense if you let it sit for a moment.

None of this is to say that Christ ever stops loving us.  I don't believe that He does.  But it's just like any other relationship.  A man may love a woman, but that doesn't mean the woman will return his love.  She may actually hate him.  No matter how many things he does for her, no matter how many times he professes his love, she only pushes him further away and tells him to leave her alone.  Eventually, someone will take that poor man aside and say to him, "If you truly love her, let her go."  Jesus loves us more than any man can love any woman, and He chooses to leave when we ask Him to, because He wants us to experience the fulfillment of loving Him freely and wholly.  

Some of you have been reading my blog since it was a Xanga (whoa.) or it was a LiveJournal (Can you believe those websites still exist?) or it was in the notes section of Facebook.  (The only one of those that still exists is on my Facebook.  I was going to try and link you to the old ones, but they've been "purged".)  If you're one of those people, it may surprise you to hear me take this view, since I vehemently espoused in the past the Christ will never leave us.  I still believe this.  I truly do.  Let me take an excerpt from the Facebook rendition of the blog to help me explain.

We talk about how we "walk away from G-d" or how we need to "return to G-d."  But I don't like it.  G-d promises that he will never leave us.

"Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of [your enemies], for the L-RD your G-d goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you.”  -Deuteronomy 31:6

"G-d has said, 'Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.'"  Hebrews 13:5

This is not just semantics.  The Bible is not saying, "G-d will not leave you, but you can leave G-d if you want."  The Bible is saying "G-d will not ever leave you."  So what of our times of sin?  What of the times that we fall short of the glory of G-d?  I answer this question with the parable of the ant.

I have always been fascinated by ants.  They're really cool.  They don't seem as dirty as other bugs.  They're so strong but so fragile.  They are incredibly organized and seem to appear out of no where.  They climb up the steepest angles and make it seem like no problem.  They come in all shapes, sizes, and colors... some breeds also have incredible super powers.  I could sit and look at them all day - perhaps that's why I've been attacked by them so many times.  Regardless of the reason why, however, I can now add to the list one more fact about ants:  I am also allergic to them.  Yes, one bite from any kind of ant - red, black, brown, big, little, it does not matter - and my body is red, puffy, and annoyingly itchy.

Think of G-d in terms of the person watching the ants, and us, in turn, as the ants themselves.  We run around and fascinate Him.  He could sit and watch us all day.  In fact, He does.  Sometimes we run away from Him as fast and as far as we possibly can.  When we realize what we've done, we say, "I've come so far!  Look at me, I'm a thousand ants away from G-d!  How could He possibly be with me now?  How could I possibly get back to him now?"  But think about this.  If you stay still, and an ant runs away from you a thousand times its length, you can still reach it.  The same is true with G-d.  No matter how far from G-d we run, we are always within his reach.  This is the joy of having a G-d who is so much bigger than us.  He truly never does leave us, even if we attempt to leave Him.

 

But that's not the end of the parable.  See, I didn't talk about my allergy for no reason.  Just as I am fascinated by the ants, G-d is fascinated by us.  Just as the ants get scared and bite me (and in turn, attempt to kill me), so do we turn and bite G-d, and we succeeded in killing Him.  Every sin is another bite, another strike to the nail.
I went to visit Kyle [Funke's grave] while I was in Raleigh recently.  There were ant hills all around his grave, and I saw them.  While I was talking to him, I allowed some of the ants to climb on my arm.  I like them a lot, so I didn't think much of them.  It wasn't until after they got scared and started biting me that I realized the sound of my voice, though I was talking softly and tenderly in the moment, was probably too much for them and their tiny ant senses.  So I returned them to the grass.  I watched my arm start to swell, and thought, "It wasn't their fault, really - they didn't realize what they were doing."  So I didn't hold it against them the next time I ran into some ants.  I still sat there and watched them go about their lives.  I know the same is true for G-d, because He said so.  As He watched his arms and legs swell around the nails that had been driven through them, He called out:

 "Forgive them, Father, for they know not what they do."  -Luke 23:34

 Don't think that the situation is any different for you.  There is no grudge that is held.  The fascination has not been tapered.  G-d absolutely adores you, and chooses to be with you, knowing that you may very well bite Him.  He has already forgiven you, so forgive yourself and move on.

He leaves, but He doesn't leave.  He is G-d, after all.  We are always within His reach.  I know it sounds like I'm contradicting myself, but I'm not.  I'm going to show you how this all fits together, but you're going to have to give me just one more blog post to do it, because this is getting entirely too long.  I will wrap it up in the next one and tie it with a nice, pretty bow.

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The Demon Possessed Man: Part 7 - Fear

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When those tending the pigs saw what had happened, they ran off and reported this in the town and countryside, and the people went out to see what had happened. When they came to Jesus, they found the man from whom the demons had gone out, sitting at Jesus’ feet, dressed and in his right mind; and they were afraid. Those who had seen it told the people how the demon-possessed man had been cured. Then all the people of the region of the Gerasenes asked Jesus to leave them, because they were overcome with fear. So he got into the boat and left. -Luke 8:34-37

Boo Radley.  If you don't know who that is, I'd highly
recommend turning off your computer and finding
your middle school English teacher.  I'm positive
he or she can help you out.  I'm also positive that he
or she would like to retroactively fail you on a
good portion of your homework assignments.

Picture the craziest, scariest Boo Radley of your town.  Now, make him strong enough to break chains and overthrow armed guards.  Also, take away his abilities to speak and hear.  Next, have him regularly tear his clothes to shreds.  Finally, make him possessed by a legion of demons that no one can banish.  Got that picture?  

Now, let's say that one day your friends dare you to tiptoe up Boo Radley's sidewalk and knock on his door.  You know you shouldn't do it, but it's a dare, so you have to.  You creep up to the porch, you raise your hand to knock, but just as you're about to finish your task, you hear voices coming from the other side of the door.  This is confusing to you, since Boo Radley clearly can't carry on a conversation.  You peek in the window just in time to see Billy Graham cast all those demons out of him.  Clearly, your first choice is to run screaming through the town, announcing what had just happened.  By the time you get back, Boo Radley is fully clothed and making lemonade to share with the townsfolk now gathered on his porch.  He's as sweet and docile as a newborn lamb.

What would you do?

Well, I know what I wouldn't do.  I wouldn't ask Billy Graham to leave.  There are a whole lot of other things I think I would ask him (What the heck just happened?  Who are you?  How did you do that?   Would you mind taking a look at my rabbit?), but certainly not, "Hey... umm... Could you get out of here, please?"

No one wanted you anyway!

I mean, I get it.  They were scared.  I would be scared, too, but I don't think I would jump straight to kicking Him out.  But that's what the people did to Jesus.  They asked Him to leave.  Maybe they were nervous about what He might do next.  Perhaps they were worried He may ask them to be His next test subjects.  I naturally try to find some reasonable explanation for them so I can say to myself, "Okay.  That's not so bad.  That's pretty understandable, actually."  But here's the thing.  The Bible never explains why they were scared, which means that it doesn't really matter.  What mattered was that they asked Him to leave.

We justify things in this way all the time.  We say, "Oh, well, her dad hit her when she was a kid, so I understand why she's slowly becoming an alcoholic."  "His parents didn't connect with him emotionally as he was growing up, so it makes sense that he's brash and distant now."  "But she was molested that one night; I think it's natural to go through a promiscuous period when you're trying to deal with that."  But I want you to hear me and hear me well right now:  The Bible doesn't say, "They were scared because they didn't understand what had just happened, so, in the moment, they asked Jesus to leave."  The Bible says that they were scared and they asked him to leave.

Their reasoning for their actions didn't matter.

So what did Jesus do?  Did He follow that idea that I somehow got in my head?  Did he stick around and beg them to let Him stay?  Did He draw out specific models of how having Him in their lives would do wonderful things for them?  Did He give them lots of money to make them feel more secure about having Him there?  Did He make their broccoli taste better and their chocolate non-fattening?  Absolutely not.  He left.

That's the unfortunate part of freewill, friends.  When we tell Him to get lost, He does.  Now, if you're anything like me, you're probably shaking your head right now, and there's a knot in your stomach, but please hear me out.  I promise I'm going to make it all make sense, but, for the sake of your time and the length of this post, I'm going to continue it tomorrow.  Honest.  Tomorrow.  It's already entirely written and on a timer to go up tomorrow at noon my time.  So look for it.

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Even still...

Words cannot express how deeply saddened by what happened in Boston. This is all I have to offer.

Make sure that nobody pays back wrong for wrong, but always strive to do what is good for each other and for everyone else. Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.
-1 Thessalonians 5:15-18 (NIV)

I will bless the Lord at all times: his praise shall continually be in my mouth.
-Psalm 34:1 (KJV)

Through him then let us continually offer up a sacrifice of praise to God, that is, the fruit of lips that acknowledge his name.
-Hebrews 13:15 (ESV)

The Lord your God is in your midst, a mighty one who will save; he will rejoice over you with gladness; he will quiet you by his love; he will exult over you with loud singing.
-Zephaniah 3:17 (ESV)

In him was life, and that life was the light of all mankind. The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it.
-John 1:4-5 (NIV)

But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God’s special possession, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light.
-1 Peter 2:9 (NIV)

The night is nearly over; the day is almost here. So let us put aside the deeds of darkness and put on the armor of light.
-Romans 13:12 (NIV)

O G-d, who brought us to birth,

and in whose arms we die,

in our grief and shock

contain and comfort us;

embrace us with your love,

give us hope in our confusion

and grace to let go into new life;

through Jesus Christ.

Amen.

Common Worship: Pastoral Services (p238)

The Demon Possessed Man: Part 6 - Respect

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Jesus asked him, “What is your name?”

“Legion,” he replied, because many demons had gone into him. And they begged Jesus repeatedly not to order them to go into the Abyss. A large herd of pigs was feeding there on the hillside. The demons begged Jesus to let them go into the pigs, and he gave them permission. When the demons came out of the man, they went into the pigs, and the herd rushed down the steep bank into the lake and was drowned.

-Luke 8:30-33

This is a section of the Bible that is incredibly near and dear to my heart.  I find it so profound that it's hard for me to add my own thoughts to it.  It's one of those things that I think loses its luster if I try to break it down.  Nevertheless, I recognize that what I see as obvious in these verses may not be as obvious to other people, so I will do my best to explain what I read in it as eloquently as possible.

It all starts with four simple words: "What is your name?"  That's where personhood begins in our minds.  It's easy for us to ignore others, to devalue them... until we know their names.  Then everything is amplified.  (This isn't as strong if we don't already have a face to attach to the name, but I think the name is what gives it definition.)  Don't believe me?  Say these sentences out loud:

That guy makes me sick.
Joseph Kony makes me sick.

That man gives me hope.
Pope Francis gives me hope.

Of course, this exercise works better if you know who these men are, but let's just assume you do (and, if you don't, substitute in the names of people you do know).  Now, ask yourself, which sentence elicited a stronger response?  Names make a difference.  It becomes infinitely harder to dehumanize someone after you have a name for them.  (The reverse is true, too, a tactic employed by Ralph Ellison, the Nazi army, the Borg, and many others... Although the true unnamed protagonist is the only complete example I can give you.)

So what's so profound about that?  Well, the profundity is found in the speaker (Christ) and his addressee (a... demon).  By asking the demon for his name, Christ is essentially saying, "I don't want to de-value you."  [Insert the sound of my mind blowing here.]  We've all heard it said that we should love our enemies (Matthew 5:44), but I think even the most G-dly of us only took this imagery to that of Christ praying for those who were try to kill Him.  Seriously, who has ever pictured this to mean that Christ loves, and even prays for demons (possibly even Satan?!)?  And yet, there He is, showing respect and value for a demon.

"What is your name?"

But wait.  There's more.

My mind would be blown even if He left it there.  But, in true Jesus-fashion, He doesn't.  The demons turn around and beg Him to not throw them back in the Abyss.  They even say, "Please, please, please, please let us experience drowning rather than make us go back there!"(Side Note: How horrible must hell be for them to beg Christ to let them drown rather than return to it?)  Every time I read this, there's a part of me that expects Christ to reply, "Away from me, you vile creature!  Have you not brought this upon yourself?  Return to your prince of darkness."  I think there's ample Biblical evidence that would allow for eyelids to remain un-batted at this response.  But that's not what Christ says.  Christ turns everything about human justice on its head with His answer.

"...He gave them permission."

So let's review:

1. Christ meets a demon.
2. The demon recognizes Christ.
3. Christ doesn't assess the demon as a purely evil, lost cause.
4. Christ is polite to the demon.
5. The demon is polite back to Christ.
6. The demon begs for mercy.
7. Christ gives the demon the mercy it wanted.

All this with the henchman of the guy who tried to take over Christ's Kingdom, failed, convinced a third of the angels to abandon Christ with him, and continues to try to take over/get even by swaying Christ's beloved children to follow him.

And you think you can't be civil to the annoying person at the desk next to you?

“You have heard that it was said, ‘Love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’  But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, that you may be children of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous.  If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing that?  And if you greet only your own people, what are you doing more than others? Do not even pagans do that?  Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect." -Matthew 5:43-48

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The Demon Possessed Man: Part 5 - Solitary Places

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...he had broken his chains and had been driven by the demon into solitary places. -Luke 8:29b

I sit here, writing to you as a self-acknowledged introvert, currently sitting in the beautiful relief that is the solitude of my office (one of my office-mates decided he's going to eat earlier than everyone else and spend his lunch breaks in the office with me... Needless to say, I'm feeling a little frazzled right now), I can't help but find this verse poignant.  I am the queen of solitude.  I go on vacations by myself and weeks will go by without me speaking to anyone.  I am well on my way to a promising career as a hermit.  That's not to say that I'm not out-going.  I'm the most outgoing introvert you'll ever meet.  I talk to people; I socialize... But I do prefer to spend my Friday nights working late then curling up with a good book.  And I definitely need time to myself, or else I find myself on the verge of a meltdown (Thank you, Sensory Integration Dysfunction).  In my world, solitude is one step from Heaven... until it's not.

Like all people, I get lonely.  Sometimes, even in the midst of a SID attack, all I want is people (well, specific people) around me, assuring me that everything is going to be okay and I will make it to the other side of this attack, just like I have every other attack before it.  Frequently, I regret my pattern of solo Friday nights, especially when I try to call friends and they all have plans - who can I blame but myself for that?

A while ago, I began to wonder why this was.  "Clearly," I thought, "G-d made me for solitude as a general rule."  G-d would be my all, and I would follow him.  Why else would He have made it so hard for me to be around other people?  But then, I joined a small group, and that small group was studying Christian communities.  I was quickly exasperated by the topic.  I didn't want anyone telling me I needed community, especially not the kind intimated by the group.  Sure, I wanted friends, but not ones who had rights to my time as they pleased and certainly not ones who felt it acceptable to speak into my life whether I wanted to hear from them or not.  That was the kind of community we studied, and I'd had enough of it within two weeks.

But slowly, ever so slowly, I began to wonder if they were right.

Here's the thing, G-d Himself is always in perfect community.  He never leaves it.  He's never left it.  He never will leave it.  Because He Himself is perfect community.  There's G-d the Father, G-d the Son, and G-d the Holy Ghost.  They're the 3-in-1: The Perfect Community.

Do you understand what Christ gave up to come to us?

He left a perfect community that He had known for all of eternity to come to a world that thrived on alienation.  He left a perfect community that had to turn its back on Him at the most trying part of His life, because He became tainted by our sins while on the cross.  He left a perfect community that was, in essence, the definition of who He was to face the cruelty of humanity on His own.

It's no wonder He was always surrounded by His friends.  He had His followers; He had His disciples; He had the apostles; and then He had the inner circle of Peter, James, and John.  Only on the rarest of instances did He set off "alone," and, when He did, Luke reports to us that He wasn't really alone, but, rather, "full of the Holy Spirit." (4:1)

In American culture, we're tempted to call this a weakness.  What?  He couldn't even handle being on His own for a bit?  I remember when I had to...  But, I ask you, when is it ever easy to constantly be around people (and keep them coming back for more)?  This is one of those moments when American thinking is just flat-out wrong.  Community isn't a sign of weakness; it's a sign of G-dliness.

We are called into perfect community because G-d is perfect community.  When we accept G-d into our lives, we become part of Him, and He becomes a part of us.  As He does this for all believers, we become a part of every believer as well, just as they become a part of us.  We are designed to crave this; that is why loneliness happens at all.  We aren't supposed to be alone.  That's the first lesson G-d ever taught us:

The L-RD G-d said, "It is not good for the man to be alone..." -Genesis 2:18

So... Why are we so intent on it, then?  Simple.  Satan knows we can't handle a lack of community.  He knows that "Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken." (Ecclesiastes 4:12)  He brings us apart on our own to try to pull us away.  There is nothing to sharpen us, to challenge us if we're on our own.  No ways to show love; no ways to show Christ.  Without the body, how can we be in G-d?

Thoughts to think about.

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The Demon-Possessed Man: Part 4 - Impure

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For Jesus had commanded the impure spirit to come out of the man. Many times it had seized him, and though he was chained hand and foot and kept under guard, he had broken his chains... - Luke 8:29

It's interesting to me that most Bibles translate this word as "impure."  I'm not going to go off and do a word study here.  Don't worry.  I've never looked at this passage in Greek, and, therefore, have never even begun to analyze if that's a good translation of the word or not.  But I do know that impure/unclean is the vast preference of translation, leaving only three that I found with "evil" as the translation, one "vile" and one "foul" (the latter two, I found later to be closer synonyms to impure than evil).  I think it warrants a pause there that most people agree that Luke did not refer to Legion as evil, but rather impure.  It makes a big difference.

I think we can all agree on things that come from evil.

The employ of child soldiers comes from evil.

School shootings come from evil.

Death camps come from evil.

Serial killings come from evil.

Genocide comes from evil.

Slander comes from evil.

Torture comes from evil.

Abuse comes from evil.

Rape comes from evil.

These are all decently straight forward.  I've left some off the list on account of thinking they may be more accurately traced to selfishness or fear... which is another post for another day.  I think we all have taken time to wonder if the people who committed such atrocities were demon-possessed.  But Luke seems to hint here that "evil" isn't the usual M.O. of demons.  (After all, Legion is called Legion on the claim that it is not just one demon but many.)  Rather, Luke appears to be indicating that the impure is a more accurate indicator of possession.

What if I were to make a list of things rooted in impurity?

Just for kicks, I went to my favorite thesaurus and looked up the word "impure."  This is what I found:

admixed, adulterated, alloyed, carnal, coarse,common, contaminated, corrupt, debased, defiled,desecrated, diluted, dirty, doctored, filthy, foul,gross*, grubby, immodest, immoral, indecent,infected, lewd, nasty, not pure, obscene, polluted,profaned, smutty, squalid, sullied, tainted,unchaste, unclean, unrefined, unwholesome, vile,vitiated, weighted, wicked

I've highlighted a couple of those in bold, hoping to attract your attention with them, whereas I want to focus in on two of those words myself.  If Luke is suggesting that it is demonic influence that brings about the impure, then it would indicate that he is suggesting in turn that that which is common, that which is diluted (read: watered-down) is based upon the demonic.  As followers of G-d, we are called to be set apart from the world, to be uncommon, to be concentrated in Him.

As I type this, I can't help but think about the orange juice my mom used to keep in the fridge at all times when I was little.  She's one of the few people I know that would make juice from concentrate; perhaps that's why that word always triggers the image of orange juice for me.  I remember one time, I was convinced I had found my way around the system of healthy eating:  I would get to the juice before she added water to it.  That was sure to make it taste better. (Honestly, I didn't think it tasted all that bad to begin with, but I thought I liked sweet things back then.)  So I got the can from the freezer, let it thaw, and tried to drink it.  Oh, I was definitely in for a surprise on that one.  I could barely keep it in my mouth.  The flavor was too much.  I couldn't handle it.

These days, our society encourages us to conform, to act in ways that make the people around us more comfortable.  (Seriously, just try going out for breakfast with your friends and telling them that you don't want to eat bacon for religious reasons.)  They don't mind us following G-d, they may even like that we do, but they do mind when we "take it too far," or become "a little much."  Faith is fine, just as long as it's mixed with the amount of water recommended on the nice, neat, little package they've wrapped around us.  If I'm right, Luke is telling us that to give into this encouragement is to give into the suggestion of demons.  We are supposed to be making people uncomfortable.  We're supposed to be making them think.  We're supposed to be using our every move as a witness.  We're supposed to be presented still-concentrated.  (And we're supposed to be spit out. "You will be hated by everyone because of me, but the one who stands firm to the end will be saved." -Matthew 10:22)

For many of us, this becomes a burden that we are unwilling to bear.  I suppose if juice concentrates could talk, they might tell us they feel similarly.  They might call from the freezer, "HEY!  YOU!  Get that pitcher out; turn on that water!  Drink me!  I want to be a part of you, of your life!  I want you to love me!"  Or... Maybe we just call that out every day by our actions.  We want to be liked.  We want everyone to love us, and, as a result, we feel the calling to be uncommon as chains holding us back from the world that rejects all things different.  We fail to see that these "chains" are nothing more than the demarcation between G-d and the world.  We see them as chains, when, in reality, they are the hands of Christ.

I'm not the only one who feels this way, so I feel confident that I'm not writing from way off in left field (Which reminds me: Baseball Season is back!  Can I get a "Hallelujah!"?!).  C.S. Lewis was writing about this idea back before my grandparents even knew each other.  In fact, he spent the entirety of The Screwtape Letters one this subject.  Let me share one of the more quoted passages from the book, because I feel that Lewis can make my point far more eloquently than I'd ever be able to.  (In case you've never read the books, they're written from the perspective of an old demon (Screwtape) writing to his young nephew (Wormwood) on how to better further the cause of their "father below.")  It's brilliantly written:

Then Sunday morning came. The Enemy reappeared. Suddenly, he was alive. Death could not hold him. But it was even worse than that. He had become an innocent sacrifice for the sins of all those humans. He had paid their penalty. He had died in their place. Now death could not hold them either. They could be forgiven and reunited with the Enemy. They can now live forever. For all practical purposes, death has died. There has never been a more disastrous day in the history of the universe.

That, my dear Wormwood, is the whole sad truth.

There is only one thing we can do. We must redouble our efforts. We must do everything we can to make sure that these humans do not believe in Jesus. And if they do believe then make them lukewarm and too busy with other things to be of any use to him. 

We have some reason to hope. Much of the media help us. And there is such a climate of pleasure-seeking and materialism that often the Christians aren't any different from anybody else. Many Christians are uncommitted. Some are hypocrites. And we have got many sincere people convinced they are so guilty that they have no hope. Others are bitter and have closed their ears to the message of the Resurrection. Others are just self-satisfied and only care about now.

This was Lewis' message in 1942.  Can you believe that it's possible for a message from then to apply so directly, word-for-word to today's people?  What's more, John writes the same thing in Revelation 3:14-22 (ESV) 2,000 years before Lewis:

And to the angel of the church in Laodicea write: "The words of the Amen, the faithful and true witness, the beginning of God's creation. 

“I know your works: you are neither cold nor hot. Would that you were either cold or hot! So, because you are lukewarm, and neither hot nor cold, I will spit you out of my mouth. For you say, I am rich, I have prospered, and I need nothing, not realizing that you are wretched, pitiable, poor,blind, and naked. I counsel you to buy from me gold refined by fire {I talk about this halfway through this post}, so that you may be rich, and white garments so that you may clothe yourself and the shame of your nakedness may not be seen, and salve to anoint your eyes, so that you may see. Those whom I love, I reprove and discipline, so be zealous and repent. Behold, I stand at the door and knock.If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in to him and eat with him, and he with me. The one who conquers, I will grant him to sit with me on my throne, as I also conquered and sat down with my Father on his throne. He who has an ear, let him hear what the Spirit says to the churches.”

It is painstakingly obvious to me that we are called to a life outside of the comfort zone - both our own and that of those around us.

Do NOT misinterpret me, though.  There is a fine line to living outside of your comfort zone and alienating people from Christ.  Be passionate and undiluted, but do so with respect and love for your fellow creations of G-d.  (Note: Showing respect does not mean that you don't offend the people around you.  Christ offended people frequently - Check out Matthew 15 for starters on this - but He still had perfect Love.  Find a balance.)

I feel I could probably write more and more on this, but we'd probably start going in circles at this point, so I'm going to leave you here.  Hopefully I'll get back to you soon with more.

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